Giving

Tis the season for giving again, and I am in full swing!  I have plans to return to Laos for New Years Eve.  Xmas is currently unknown, although I have no longing pains as last year.  I accept what I have, and who I chose to have around me during a time when I am to be surrounded by food, family n’ friends back home.

Besides, I celebrate life all the time.

First thing I must say.  I was at the lake the other Sunday with my two best buddies’, Porm and Vireak.  We are rarely altogether so I was beaming.  They were both wearing the clothing I gave them.  It was a funny moment that only my heart shared, because I felt respected and appreciated as an older brother.  They made me swim further than I like to, but I reached the floating log safely where they were waiting for me.  I am sure that’s an analogy for something.  “Something” being the acknowledgement of what I can influence and how my own actions influence me to go further in character development, like a thickening plot.  I am running out of clothes but finding more truth.  So does the naked man shine brightest?    

I will say that my bleeding heart likes to leak more of my life blood than necessary sometimes.  That is a morbid reference to giving so much that I have to question the sacrifice that entails and if it was a good choice.  Expending efforts for others that are always open to receiving is the risk I take.  As a country that has been receiving foreign aid for a long time, that people themselves have come quite accustomed to getting many things handed to them.  Therefore, although poverty riddled, the gifts are not seen as extra ordinary, but rather a matter of fact.  I am the rich man, with boundless wealth merely because I am what I represent, although I would return to Canada with less money and luggage, whenever that is!     

I did recommend a person for a job with my organization 10 months ago and really pushed for his chance to get employed.  “Sary” was a monk for 15 years and never had a job, and exuded something special.  He finally got a translator role and he is forever thankful.  Next, I wrote another person’s application for a scholarship to Costa Rica and he got it! (I don’t know his name. We aren’t close, but I read his story of struggle and acted.)

I have helped another friend get an interview, and most recently wrote a recommendation letter and rewrote an application for another scholarship for an Indigenous youth.  I don’t know the end result, but this has been a new time in my life where I can actualize my abilities to open doors to those that find me. 

The work I conduct in the office where I strive for capacity development is a success story that is culminating nicely.  I won’t explain much about my objectives reached in this blog, as this is the more personal entry.

As I fluctuate within states of peace, in depth and skimming along the surface I know that I am blessed.  I also know that this is more of the person I enjoy to be than many other previous times in my life, and I am grateful.  I have allowed myself to let Cambodia shape me, and I have reaped 100 fold of what I have put out.  I know this is precious, that’s why I cherish this gift.  Happy holidays.